5 Faults of Romantasy (It Doesn’t Have to be This Way)
Fantasy is such a wonderful genre. The action and excitement have a way of drawing us in. Love is beautiful. Combine the two, and there’s no wonder why romantasy is so popular. But not all romantasy books are great. Many have common threads that are problematic, but could be fixed to give readers a much deeper, satisfying story.
#1 Shallow Relationships
Some books tend to focus on characters’ appearances. I mean, really focus on it. In this kind of book, it’s as though looks are the main factor in the main characters’ attraction and relationship.
I once read a fantasy book where the mmc (male main character) was frequently described. Hair, face, build. Hair, face, build. We did a thing where we slayed monsters, and by the way, HAIR, FACE, BUILD!
I get it already! Doesn’t the guy have redeeming qualities other than being textbook handsome?
I’ve also read a book that had the mmc paying far too much attention to the fmc’s (female main character) beauty. I wound up not finishing the book; it got too, shall we say, intense. But that’s another topic. My point is, when it comes to focusing on a character’s looks, the issue goes both ways.
Putting too much focus on physical looks not only makes a book uncomfortable to read, but it also dehumanizes the characters, making them more like objects to behold than people to get to know. And if this is how we think of fictional people, how do we consider real ones?
In real life, a relationship must be more than physical attraction. Otherwise, it is not a healthy relationship for either of the people involved.
If books are reflections of reality, they should portray more than shallow attraction.
Fix It: Deep Relationships
Now, don’t get me wrong. Physical attraction is real and is not a sin when it remains pure. Thinking, “He’s handsome,” or, “She’s pretty,” is not wrong. Just don’t let the attraction lead to lust or impure thoughts. The same goes for books.
Physical attraction is all right when handled properly, but a healthy relationship is far more than that. In books, it should play a lesser role in the characters’ relationship. Instead of placing focus on looks, the spotlight should be on a character’s… well, character.
Who is the character? What are their strengths? Hopes? Fears?
Tell us their backstory; what makes them who they are. And why are they and their love interest a good match?
Like in real life, the relationship should be based on compatibility, not how good-looking a person is. The characters should complement each other (and I’m not talking about verbal compliments). Where one is weak, the other should be strong. They should help each other, encourage each other, grow together.
This is why the friendship phase is so important. But it is, sadly, often missed in romantasy. There can be a thread of attraction from the start, but a thread shouldn’t suddenly become an entire tapestry. There is a weaving process in between. The characters need to learn about each other and build the relationship naturally.
While “whirlwind courtships” have been known to lead to a happy ending in real life, it is extremely rare. Rushing a relationship isn’t generally a good idea. Letting it breathe and grow as the characters’ story draws them together makes for a much deeper and more realistic relationship than having them fall in love in a matter of days.
#2 Obsessive Characters
Characters, especially mmcs, tend to be obsessed over their love interest. Again, not a foundation to build a healthy relationship on. Being obsessed with someone isn’t romantic. Frankly, it’s creepy!
Surprisingly, obsession isn’t only a problem in darker books. This issue can pop up in any story. The character will focus so much on their love interest that they can’t think of anything else. They have no other friends or completely ignore them. They often ignore all other priorities, too.
I think it’s usually supposed to show devotion and how much they care about their love interest. But handled incorrectly, devotion becomes obsession.
There is a fine line between the two. Devotion is a good thing; sweet and necessary in any relationship. Obsession is unhealthy. In some cases, depending on how it is portrayed, obsession can easily become possessiveness, which often progresses into control and abuse.
Needless to say, this isn’t something we want in real life. There are so many real-life horror stories about possessive partners. It’s extremely toxic, so why glorify it in books?
Fix It: Balanced Characters
What if, instead of diving off the deep end of obsession, the characters were more balanced? What if they were truly devoted in a healthy way?
They could be devoted to their love interest to the point that they would lay down their life for them. That’s the kind of love we love to see. But their love interest shouldn’t be their only interest.
The character should have friends (if the plot doesn’t require them to be alone). They should have hopes and goals.
In reality, it isn’t healthy to place all our dreams and focus on one person. Characters shouldn’t either. Just like real people, they should have a balance. It also makes for a more interesting, less shallow read.
Characters need fully rounded personalities. When they have nothing else they care about, talk about, or think about other than their love interest, it’s time to wonder if the character is not only two-dimensional but perhaps a little psychotic.
Balanced characters feel more real and relatable, which makes them more memorable.
#3 Pushy Characters
When reading, we can sometimes run across pushy characters. Again, usually the mmc. He wants the girl, no matter what, and aims to get her. There is some overlap with obsession here, but this one sometimes flies under the radar a bit because it’s often framed as persistence rather than unhealthy obsession. He loves her too much to give up! But in reality, he’s often more of an insistent creep than someone who should be framed as a hero.
Quick question. Would it be romantic for a man to pursue a woman after she has told him several times that she isn’t interested? No, it wouldn’t. It may also be grounds for legal charges. In a word: harassment. It isn’t tolerated in real life, so why is it portrayed as romantic in books?
No means no. It doesn’t mean to keep asking until she says yes. It doesn’t mean to convince her. It doesn’t mean to be pushy.
Yet so many mmcs are. It’s irritating. Yes, he should fight for his lady, pursue her, woo her. But not to the point of being insistently pushy and “not taking no for an answer”.
Fix It: Respectful Characters
The love interests should respect each other. They shouldn’t break boundaries or try to force the other into something they’re not comfortable with. Pursue and woo while being respectful and patient. And if it’s no, it’s no.
Real relationships can’t survive without respect. At least, a healthy relationship can’t.
While being pushy is usually an mmc problem, I’m not just asking for a respectful man. The fmc needs the same qualities of patience and being mindful of his boundaries. Women can be toxic, too. Many are, to be honest. Being pushy and disrespectful isn’t a gender-specific issue. Men and women both need to be respectful, in life and in books.
And this goes beyond romance. Everyone wants to be treated with respect.
There’s a pretty common trope in romantasy where the mmc is absolutely wonderful to his woman, but is a horrible person otherwise. This isn’t cool. A hero who respects his lady but is rude to everyone else isn’t a hero at all.
The characters need to act with proper respect for each other and everyone else. More than that, they should be someone worthy of respect.
A little off topic? Maybe. But it needs to be said.
And, be honest, no one wants a love interest who isn’t worthy of respect.
#4 Full Heart, Empty Head
Once more, this is aimed at the mmc. Wow. We’re talking about mmcs a lot. Why is it usually the man who gets the bad side of things in stories? Like in this case, where the mmc is basically an empty-headed cupcake.
Does he think?
Seriously, does he?
He may be sweet, devoted, and all those good things, but what about intelligence, strengths, and… an actual personality?
And is he useful? Does he add anything to the plot other than being cute? Or is he a male version of a damsel in distress?
Now, I have nothing against a girl saving the day, even saving the guy. Strong female leads can be great (I’ve written some tough ladies in my own books many times). But why do men have to be useless and/or dumb?
What happened to mmcs being real mean? The kind that will stand up and fight if need be, and won’t back down when standing for what is right. The ones that provide, protect, and lead while still being honorable men who will listen to and be there for the fmc no matter what.
An mmc can be soft and sweet while still being strong and intelligent. Yet so many are either weak or toxic. They are dimwitted window dressings with no purpose beyond being a love interest for the fmc. Or they are “alphas” who treat the fmc like his property.
Okay, let me switch gears and pick on fmcs for a minute here, because being unrealistic applies to them too.
Often, the fmc tends to be tougher than every man, even those who are twice her size and have more training. True, in some cases strength is not the defining factor in a fight. It depends on various factors. Generally, though, the fmc is tiny, and her opponents are far bigger. Most of the time, this is a recipe for disaster… unless you’re the fmc because no one can beat her because she’s just that awesome.
Like I said earlier, I have nothing against strong female leads. I love it when a strong woman saves the day because, really, it is pretty cool. Girl power! But please make it more realistic.
More importantly, fmcs are often missing an actual personality. It is far too common for the strong woman character to be all sass and snark. That’s it. That’s her whole personality. Oh, but sometimes she has other traits, such as hating anything feminine and believing she needs no man.
While these things are real character traits, she needs more than just sass and confidence. Otherwise, she is unrealistic and shallow. Maybe even a little toxic, because, come on, can’t she be nice? Ever?!
Fix It: Realistic Characters
We need more real men and real women in fiction. We need mmcs who are intelligent, caring, and strong in character and not just physical strength. He can be gentle and a heart of gold without turning into a puppy. He can also be tough and protective without being toxic. Again, a character with balance. A real man.
We have enough mmcs portraying the kind of men ladies should avoid. We need some that show what a good man is.
The same goes for fmcs. She can be strong, good at fighting, and all that awesome stuff. But she should also be… well, a woman. The fmc can be tough without losing her femininity. Let her carry a sword, but also let her enjoy beauty. She can go into battle. And she can also be gentle and nurturing.
Real people have layers. Strengths and weaknesses. Good qualities and faults. No one is going to be good at everything, and everyone makes mistakes. It’s just part of being human, and characters feel more real when they reflect this.
The fmc and mmc both need layers in their character. Why can’t she be both strong and feminine? And why can’t he be gentle without being a pushover? They can and should be.
#5 Remain on the Dark Side
There are two common tropes in romantasy called enemies-to-lovers and morally gray. Both are wildly popular and can be good when handled correctly. The problem is that they sometimes aren’t.
I’m all for enemies-to-lovers, but there is a right and wrong way to portray this trope. Done right, it can be a beautiful tale of grace and redemption. Done wrong, and it makes for a toxic environment. The same can be said for morally gray characters.
It gets toxic when the characters don’t change. They don’t turn away from their dark days, or if they do, they have no remorse for what they’ve done.
He gets the girl. She gets the guy. End of story. No need for an apology for previous fighting. No need to make amends for their past actions, whatever they may have done.
I’ve actually read a book about a morally gray hero who was an assassin. He stopped being one only because of the fmc, but didn’t really have a redemption arc. At one point, he literally said he has no regrets for killing those people.
To me, this just seems… wrong. I don’t care if the book is Christian or not; a character who is supposed to be the hero should have a redemption arc, meaning he turns away from his dark past. He doesn’t justify it. He realizes his mistakes and changes. When he doesn’t, morally gray becomes problematic because if he sees no issue with what he has done, he hasn’t really changed and is still a bad guy at heart. Same for enemies-to-lovers. There needs to be healing and moving away from past mistakes.
When the character remains on the wrong track, it can turn into an unhealthy relationship for them and their love interest. Remember how a character being good to their love but rude to everyone else is bad? Similar thing here. There needs to be a true change of heart for things to go well.
On another note, and this is more annoying than toxic, in romantasy books the characters may turn from enemies to lovers abruptly. One minute, they’re trying to stab each other. The next, they’re attracted. Umm… really? Your enemy gets to live just because they’re cute? It’s not logical.
Fix It: Change of Heart
Enemies-to-lovers and morally gray characters are great if handled correctly. But when the character needs to change, they should change. They shouldn’t stay in the darkness. They should have remorse for what they’ve done and try to be a better person.
When they have a redemption arc, it shows that people can change. It becomes a story of grace and forgiveness.
Also, characters are often on the wrong side because of a false belief or trauma. Instead of having the love interest accept their darkness, maybe they could be a positive influence that shows them the light.
The love interest helping them through the process of healing and seeing the hope of good in them before anything romantic develops is infinitely more meaningful than the usual “stabby man cute” that fills so many books.
We need more books that show how, even if we travel a dark path, we don’t have to stay there. Change is possible. Instead of ignoring or accepting the darkness, let’s illuminate it.
Why is any of this important?
What we consume affects how we think. If we fill our minds full of toxic relationships and people, romanticizing them and seeing them as good, it may eventually color our real-life perspectives.
This is why it is so important to be mindful of what we consume, including what we read. There are so many books out there filled with toxic and unrealistic portrayals of so-called love. It can be difficult to find books that align with our convictions, but they are out there.
There are many books that show love in the proper light. They have characters who are balanced and rounded, healthy relationships, and couples worthy of their happily ever after. Books that show what real love and God-honoring relationships look like.
Books worth reading. And we need more of them.
